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2004-11-16 - 7:10 p.m.

i didn't go to school today.
i don't want to go at all. I'm too tired. All the time. No matter how much sleep i get, it just makes thingz worse. I'm exhausted. I want to sleep forever.

Itz like I'm not here anymore. I keep doing the everyday things but everything becomes fuzzy later. By the time its night i've forgotten the morning and by the time its morning i've forgotten the night b4. I don't remember anything i'm meant to do. I don't have a life anymore. I'm alwayz confused about something. I can barely remember who I am.

How long is this going to go on? I want to be normal again. When I laugh, I want to mean it. I don't want to cry ever again. I want to feel something apart from sadness and confusion. I keep getting angry at people for no reason and i get angrier and angrier until I just explode at them. I'm fucking up the lives of my friends and family. I can't pretend to be nice anymore. Who the hell am I???

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