Get your own fucked up
 diary at! contact god The Old Shit<area shape=

2005-01-07 - 5:06 p.m.

i have all this stuff i wanna write. but i won't. Because i cannot write what i want in this diary. I do that in my other one.

therez this one song that is getting to me. i don't know why. i don't know any of the wordz. itz just the music. itz by marilyn manson. i think itz called spade. i don't know how many timez i've listened to it. 20....30.

Therez so many thingz screaming around my head. Abstract stuff.

when we said till we die..



i want to be a vampyre and bite sum1z neck and have the darkness all around me.

i want to be sumthing not of this world. Wouldn't be much change. I barely am of this world anywayz.

Kaboom Kaboom

I can imagine strangling sum1. I can see myself doing it. I want to do that. Hold their neck and watch the panic in their eyez and see them gasping for breath.
Or stab sum1 and watch them bleed.
Make sum1 cry for mercy and just smile. And watch them die.
I could do that.
I want to do that.

I like Charles Manson. I reckon he woz smart. To get people to do those thingz for him. He woz like the ultimate.

Insight in2 a twisted mind.

Imagine the fear u would have if u were watching sum1 getting ready to kill u or torture u. Wouldn't u rather it to be sudden and surprising. I would never give sum1 that. Never let them have it easy. Coz then whatz the point of killing them if u can't see their pain and make them suffer first.

Death by a thousand cutz. Little tiny papercutz. So harmless on their own. Makez a great death.
Or u make sum1 swallow this long piece of material then u rip it back up. Take out all their insides.
Or make them swallow bamboo and have it grow out of their stomach. Thatz a good one.
Quartered where they tied ur armz and legz to 4 different horses and made the horses run so u got pulled apart.
There's these ppl that if they disgraced their kind they would disembowel themselves. I admire them.

Scared yet.

Now now don't cry. Ambre won't hurt u. She'll just make u suffer so much u'll end up killing urself.

'My blood dripz like water from a rose' - Izzabelle

previous - next

about me - read my profile! U might scream read other Diar
yLand diaries! recommend my diary to a psychiatrist! Get
 your own fun, fucked up + free diary at!