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2004-11-24 - 7:29 p.m.

i'm actin real weird at the moment. Like, since i tried to kill myself i haven't felt as depressed but if someone sayz something about me or is in a bad mood, i kinda get.....psychotic. i'll yell and nearly cry or something. I can't figure out if itz worse then being depressed all the time. Fuck, even if someone is whispering near me or laughing, I start to shake because I'm paranoid that they are saying something about me or that they are laughing at me.
I need happiness all the time. Itz fuckin weird.
A couple of dayz ago someone said something about me and I fuckin screamed at them. Scared the shit out of them 2.

Sadness cannot be ignored, it can alwayz eat through the barriers you put up to stop it. And it becomes stronger the longer you ignore it.

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